Ques: I am not having relationship problems but maybe there are things in my past I have not let go of. I’m an emotional wreck. I am not sure why I reached out to you but something in my heart and soul lead me to you. I lost my Mom 2 yrs. ago and ever since that time, I have not been the same. I find that I drink a lot more than I ever did just so I can relax and pretend I am happy. I am letting myself go. I honestly do not care if I live or die. I don’t think I’m depressed and I do not believe in being medicated. (I am rambling so please accept my apologies). Other than my hubby I really have no one to talk to. I don’t trust most people, especially women. I know we haven’t talked in awhile but for some reason when I see your pictures/post on Facebook, you have this inner peace that comes through and I want to have the same peace. Is this even possible?
Dear You Matter:
Answer: First let me say “YOU MATTER” I know it may not seem like it at this present time. Especially when you’re unable to move pass the pain. My deepest condolences for the loss of your Mom. I completely identify with that pain you are experiencing. I lost my Mother at age 9. However, it didn’t hit me fully until my twenties. There are no words one can profess over losing a parent, but there is comfort in knowing that their presence will ALWAYS surround us. Hold onto the pleasant memories for they provide that peace you are longing for. There are five stages of grief: denial, crying, eating, anger and rage. Dealing with the process of these stages head on; will allow you to find the serenity in life that is missing. “Everyday given is an opportunity to achieve greatness. Don’t let the temporary hiccups in life take your breath away.” YOU MATTER. Although, you state you “don’t believe in being medicated.” But you also do recognize that your drinking is progressing to what maybe an UN-healthy status.
Speaking from experience, what you are feeling is a temporary pain that will heal over time. You may not have the girlfriends you desire, but you have the most important confidant of all; Your Husband. Here are a few suggestions to getting your GLOW back. (1) Share your hurts and concern with your husband, letting him provide you comfort during this UN-settling time of your life. That’s what the UNION is about. Trusting your mate that, he may not have all the right answers, but his listening WILL ease that dark cloud. (2) If you don’t currently have a Journal, purchase one tomorrow. Journal your thoughts daily and at the end of the week go back and re-visit to see your progress and transformation. (3) Its perfectly OK to seek counseling. Know that “You Matter” and at times we must put self-first. You can’t continue to push down what you’re feeling because over time that grief you are holding onto will explode. (4) Take it to God… Whether you reach out to your Pastor or a Spiritual Adviser they definitely can be a source of healing for you. Place this verse in an area you view daily. “I love the Lord, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications. Because he hath included his ear unto me, therefore will I call upon him as long as I live.” Psalms 116:1-2 KJV
I can honestly say once you STOP carrying that baggage of pain. The flood gates of peace and contentment will open up. In order to trust the process, you must commit to doing what needs to be done. I have a saying “If you want the recipe to turn out right. You better following the directions and don’t skim on the necessary ingredients.” I believe in YOU and thank you for the humbling comment.
Until next time live FABULOUS…
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Until next time live FABULOUS...
#GLAM "God's Love Always Magnifies." (TM) ~ Kimberly |
Ask Kimberly…Have a Beauty, Fashion, Relationship, Wedding or Lifestyle question, please email our lifestyle expert. If you like to be kept anonymous please state so in your initial email.
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